70+ Hilarious Spongebob Quotes Of All Time

Spongebob is the character from Spongebob Squarepants, which is one of the most loved TV shows of all time. Created by marine biologist and animator Stephen Hillenburg for Nickelodeon, it is one of the funniest TV shows with lots of funny characters and it never gets old. Spongebob is hilarious and its quotes are the same. We have prepared a list of some of our favorite quotes from Spongebob.

Which one is your favorite Spongebob Quotes?

“You never really know the true value of a moment, until it becomes a memory.”

“Well, it’s no secret that the best thing about a secret is secretly telling someone your secret, thereby, secretly adding another secret to their secret collection of secret, secretly.”

“I’m ready, I’m ready.”

“All I know is fine dining and breathing.”

“Everything FUN!”

“Firmly grasp it in your hand.”

“Look at all the hip young people eating sal-ads.”

Spongebob: “Aw, cheer up, Squid! It could be worse!” Patrick: “Yeah. You could be bald and have a big nose.”

“I know of a place where you never get harmed. A magical place with magical charm. Indoors. Indoors. Indoors!”  

“No one can change a person, but someone can be a reason for that person to change.”

“Ravioli, ravioli. Give me the formuoli.”

“With imagination, you can be anything you want.”

“Excuse me, sir, but you’re sitting on my body, which is also my face.”

“F is for fire that burns down the whole town, U is for Uranium…bombs! N is for no survivors!”

“If you believe in yourself and with a tiny pinch of magic, all your dreams can come true.”

spongebob quotes

“You don’t need a license to drive a sandwich.”

“The best time to wear a striped sweater…is all the time.”

“Patrick, I don’t think Wumbo is a real word.” “Come on. You know, I wumbo, you wumbo, he/she/me wumbo. Wombology, the study of wumbo! It’s first grade SpongeBob!”

“Always follow your heart unless your heart is bad with directions.”

“I’m ugly and I’m proud!”

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“If I were to die right now in a fiery explosion due to the carelessness of a friend…. Then it would just be alright.”

“Can I be excused for the rest of my life?”

“Moss always points to civilization.”

“The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me.”

“This is not your average, everyday darkness. This is… ADVANCED darkness.”

“We don’t need television…not as long as we have our imagination.”

“Remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets.”

“I’ll have you know that I stubbed by toe last week and only cried for 20 minutes.”

“I’m a good noodle!”

“F is for friends who do stuff together!”

spongebob quotes about friendship

“Oh well, I guess I’m not wearing any pants today!”

“Good people don’t rip other people’s arms off.”

“I’m so loyal, I don’t mind sleeping out in the cold, hard ground while Captain Krabs sleeps in his warm, dry tent.”

“Run Mr. Krabs! Run like you’re not in a coma!”

“Squidward that’s not the peace treaty, that’s a copy of the peace treaty.”

Spongebob: “Quick, Patrick, without thinking: if you could have anything right now, what would it be?” Patrick: “Um… more time for thinking.”

“I have worked for Mr. Krabs for many years and always thought he was a great boss.”

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“And tonight, after my big promotion, we’re gonna party till we’re purple.”

“Pull your pants up, Patrick. We’re going home.”

“A Triple Gooberberry Sunrise, huh? I guess I could use one of those.”

“Ha ha ha ha, it’s a giraffe.”

“Do you smell it? That smell, the kind of smelly smell. A smelly smell that smells… smelly.”

funny spongebob quotes


“I don’t get it. I made my house a mess, which was making it clean, which made Squidward clean my yard, but that really means he’s messing it up. But the opposite of clean is filth, which means filth is clean, that means Squidward is really making my yard a wreck, but I normally wreck my own yard which means, Squidward is being the opposite of Squidward which means he’s SpongeBob!”

“Is Mayonnaise an instrument?”

“Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died… the end.”

“It took three days to make that potato salad…three days!!!”

“Oh, these aren’t homemade. They were made in a factory… a bomb factory. They’re bombs.”

“You just CAN’T WAIT for me to die, can you?”

“Do instruments of torture count?”

“Hello, we’re with the pet hospital down the street, and I understand you have a dying animal on the premises.”

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“Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24… 25!”

“We should take Bikini Bottom and push it somewhere else!”

“This is a load of barnacles…”

“Now he’s gonna kick my butt!”

“Too bad SpongeBob isn’t here to enjoy SpongeBob not being here.”

“Hahahaha that guy got hit in the head with a coconut hahaha.”

“My sandwich tastes like a fried boot.” “My sandwich is a fried boot!”

“Too bad that didn’t kill me.”

“The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.”

“Who are you people?!”

spongebob quotes

“I can’t see my forehead!”

“It’s just a cruel reminder that I’m single and likely to remain that way forever.”


“I knew I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed today.”

“But it’s my only night to be fancy!”

“I might as well sleep for 100 years or so.”

“Goodbye everyone, I’ll remember you all in therapy.”

“Hmmm, a five-letter word for happiness…money.”

“It’s not always what you say that matters, sometimes it’s what you don’t say.”

“No one can change a person, but someone can be a reason for that person to change.”

“Sometimes we have to go deep inside ourselves to solve our problems.”

“Home is where you’re surrounded by other critters that care about you.”

“Always follow your heart unless your heart is bad with directions.”

“You’ll never get what you want if you always let people step on you.”

“Knowledge cannot replace friendship.”

“Well, it may be stupid, but it is also dumb.”

“Are they laughing at us? No, they are laughing next to us.”

“Who would want a friend as ugly as I am? They would! It makes them feel better about the way they look!”